For those of you who follow me weekly, you know that this special place , my blog, is where I share my process, my vulnerability. not for sympathy, but because so many feel some of these same dark feelings, yet guilt and isolation can set in. This is a safe space to know that many of us walk in the same shoes!
Last week was about a relationship that may never be the fantasy or the ideal and yet, it is perfect in the grand plan - pain helps us humans to learn lessons and become more empathic towards others.
This week feels like a year all rolled into one. First, I opened a bank account with my business partner, making it official that we are committed to making a difference in a big way in healthcare. Two days later, I spent 3 1/2 hours waiting at the CA health insurance division to see what my options are and while having a lovely customer service rep listen to my story, understand my needs, I left there with more legwork to do before finding out my options. As I sat there, I pondered the definition of "Health Insurance". What "insurance"?! There are no guarantees and the state of healthcare in this country is not about health, but really is about disease management and critical care. While these areas are needed, what is more important is learning how to prevent these costly illnesses from manifesting in the first place. Enough said!
I attended two town planning meetings about the future direction of Ojai - a place that is known for spiritual leaders and exceptional education rooted in critical thinking. I felt very excited and engaged to be listening to the passion for honoring the earth, living sustainably and creating initiatives to foster collaboration amongst the community at large.
More critical to my path was taking time on Saturday and Sunday to observe my pace and my thoughts, allowing myself not to rush, checking off my never-ending list, but to really tune into what I need. This was partly spearheaded by a conversation with a dear friend and colleague who has been ill for these past few years as well. While the cause of immune suppression is different, our paths have been so similar and we tend to have very similar go-getter personalities. She shared with me that she is taking time to heal - she is not working, she sleeps in as needed, walks the beach and gardens. She has really "allowed" herself to give herself time in a loving way.
I was so struck by our conversation, knowing deep down that I have not allowed that to happen fully. Yes,our circumstances are different, but in the end, it is tapping into this deep place of deserving and allowing oneself to honor what is needed. This weekend was a peek into a new reality and it felt great. The next 30 days will be the test - remember it takes 30 days to create a new habit!
Think about your reset button and tune in!
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