As I approached each morning for about two weeks, I felt more stiff, more foggy, more forgetful. Hmm, I even started to preface my conversations with my girls stating, "I may have told you this but . . .", and this was mildly disconcerting yet funny at the same time. I envisioned myself as having my finger in a socket and my hair standing on end, fried and burnt out!
All of a sudden, I had this feeling that it had been a really long time without changing the 3 month estrogen support and when I checked the calendar, voila, I had forgotten to mark it in place. Now I was about two weeks overdue.
How ironic, this feeling of age and cognitive dullness really impacted my state of well-being. It was also comical how "ditsy" I felt. Soon, I began to laugh, called my girls and told them the story. I also realized once again on a personal level, how much our lives as women are impacted by the communication of the hormonal ebb and flow.
As I look over my history, I was diagnosed with Pituitary Insufficiency which means that the master gland which directs the precursors to hormones, does not work properly in my body. I've had infertility, hypothyroidism, adrenal imbalance and over the past few years, had really noticed a difference in memory retention and clarity in thinking, until my endocrinologist suggested hormone replacement.
I had been dead set against HRT given all the bad press, but as I've learned more about personalized approaches to replacement, I became more open to the idea. There was a lot of trial and error in the beginning, but once we established the right doses for each hormone - estrogen, progesterone and testosterone - I began to feel human again. Eureka - the fountain of youth!
The lesson here is that we are all unique in our individual needs and it is important to seek assistance from professionals who "think outside the box" and who listen to the needs of their patients.
May you feel blessed,
Julie
Saturday, May 30, 2015
Sunday, May 17, 2015
The Bunion and The Shell from A Mind Body Spirit Perspective
As I reflected on the past few weeks while on my yoga mat this morning, I first gave thanks to my feet for carrying me along the way in life. Why, one might ask?
I have had bunions on both feet for years, but during these last many months, the left bunion has grown to a size that really impacts wearing shoes and at times, makes walking uncomfortable. Just two weeks ago as I was leaving my oncologist's office, his final words were, "No infections!". Later that day, my bunion was so painful that I noticed as my removed my shoe my foot felt a bit wet. I looked down and voila, an infected corn on the bunion! How ironic. I chose to soak it in vinegar and warm water and bandaged it with tea tree oil.
Keeping an eye on the reddened area overnight, it looked much better the next day, although still oozing. As I joked about having the world's ugliest feet (and my kids agree!), I really took time and care to soak them, wrap them and thank them for being here through all of life's ups and downs. This was a different approach for me, as I have often been very self-critical and demanding on my body to heal, be perfect, get on with it, but I now have a much kinder attitude for the vulnerabilities that each of our bodies contain.
The infection cleared, then came back again a few days later and this time, my girls demanded that I call the doctor, which I did. I met with her and we both agreed that while it is taking a much longer time to heal infections at this time given my weak immune system, we also acknowledged how my body is really fighting to indeed heal! This is good news - the silver lining, the pearl in the clam, the diamond in the rough!
If I stop and renew where I've been physically, emotionally and spiritually, the road has been convoluted yet still reaching for the "heavens". I am "whole, perfect, healed" - mantra from my coach - and this is merely part of the process.
Onto the shell. As the yoga class went on, we began twists and reaching the heart toward the "heavens". The pain in my arms and mid-back, made it so difficult to do, that I began to wince and quietly cry on my mat. I breathed even more deeply, allowing myself to sink more into the poses, recognizing that the protective holding only perpetuates the tightness and pain. This is all about trust, letting go and letting God! My Sunday morning yoga class has replaced church for the present, and yet, I am so aware of God's presence in my practice.
I also recognize how my hardened shell in my thoracic or mid-spine, has walled off my heart, protecting it from hurts and traumas. I've been told by many spirituals guides over these past few years that I have engaged in this self-protection since very early in my life. I find it so interesting how my physical body has molded itself - the structure and function - into armor that no longer serves its purpose. I am ready to breathe, to embrace life with all of its highs and lows, and am breathing through my physical pain to reach the innermost of my soul. I am getting there! And so can you.
With love and appreciation,
Julie
I have had bunions on both feet for years, but during these last many months, the left bunion has grown to a size that really impacts wearing shoes and at times, makes walking uncomfortable. Just two weeks ago as I was leaving my oncologist's office, his final words were, "No infections!". Later that day, my bunion was so painful that I noticed as my removed my shoe my foot felt a bit wet. I looked down and voila, an infected corn on the bunion! How ironic. I chose to soak it in vinegar and warm water and bandaged it with tea tree oil.
Keeping an eye on the reddened area overnight, it looked much better the next day, although still oozing. As I joked about having the world's ugliest feet (and my kids agree!), I really took time and care to soak them, wrap them and thank them for being here through all of life's ups and downs. This was a different approach for me, as I have often been very self-critical and demanding on my body to heal, be perfect, get on with it, but I now have a much kinder attitude for the vulnerabilities that each of our bodies contain.
The infection cleared, then came back again a few days later and this time, my girls demanded that I call the doctor, which I did. I met with her and we both agreed that while it is taking a much longer time to heal infections at this time given my weak immune system, we also acknowledged how my body is really fighting to indeed heal! This is good news - the silver lining, the pearl in the clam, the diamond in the rough!
If I stop and renew where I've been physically, emotionally and spiritually, the road has been convoluted yet still reaching for the "heavens". I am "whole, perfect, healed" - mantra from my coach - and this is merely part of the process.
Onto the shell. As the yoga class went on, we began twists and reaching the heart toward the "heavens". The pain in my arms and mid-back, made it so difficult to do, that I began to wince and quietly cry on my mat. I breathed even more deeply, allowing myself to sink more into the poses, recognizing that the protective holding only perpetuates the tightness and pain. This is all about trust, letting go and letting God! My Sunday morning yoga class has replaced church for the present, and yet, I am so aware of God's presence in my practice.
I also recognize how my hardened shell in my thoracic or mid-spine, has walled off my heart, protecting it from hurts and traumas. I've been told by many spirituals guides over these past few years that I have engaged in this self-protection since very early in my life. I find it so interesting how my physical body has molded itself - the structure and function - into armor that no longer serves its purpose. I am ready to breathe, to embrace life with all of its highs and lows, and am breathing through my physical pain to reach the innermost of my soul. I am getting there! And so can you.
With love and appreciation,
Julie
Sunday, May 3, 2015
Cycles, The Aftermath and Freedom
From the depths of darkness to envisioning the white light, this past two weeks has included the continuum of these seemingly polar opposites.
A few weeks ago my mind was filled with self-doubt, with tears at the surface, feeling both physical and emotional pain. I was in this place of finally realizing what this past year has been - a year filled with constant change, uncertainty, illness, financial distress - and one that I got through quite "nicely". As I've referred to in the past, my coping style is to get through challenging times, and later, feel my emotions. In some cases, it is a year later before I even realize that I have not processed what has happened. This was surely the case here.
Each morning I awoke, remembering being in the hospital, remembering the fear I had about having a very large needle inserted into my left hamstring with no anesthesia. In fact, it was the first time I ever cried about a medical procedure, having my entire backside exposed to docs, nurses, ultrasound folks and while not feeling embarrassed, it was lying on my side with no place to escape - not knowing what the pain might feel like that scared me. The surgery which followed was easier! During this week of remembering, I needed to have blood work done which is pretty routine for me these days as I continue to build my immune system back to health, and as I left the hospital, I burst into tears, recalling how my doc told me just a year ago that he had not seen these particular cancer markers so high before.
This statement was such a disconnect for me because I was still quite functional through it all. How could this be - and yet it was. However, it no longer IS. The reality is that the past is now in the past and "each new day and moment, I am manifesting my dream of health, wholeness and abundance".
Manifestation is a process that I am working on with my coach and it has not been easy because this process requires that one take time to meditate and quiet the mind in order to focus on the moment at hand. All the shoulds, must dos and have tos do not exist - they are part of the subconscious and ego that evades being in the moment.
While the week of emotion was challenging, I believe in its benefit to really put the past to rest and as Geneen Roth stated in one of her books, "The only way around it is through it", really makes sense to me. I felt my feelings, allowed them as painful as they were, while also knowing that the reality is that I am healed, whole and perfect with my imperfections!
With the help of my coach, Matthew, I entered the following week with more peace, present-tense focus and life seemed to flow more smoothly.
This morning as I picked out my Angel Card, I pulled Freedom and the words were so very meaningful: "You may feel trapped right now by life conditions. By drawing this card, the angels ask you to realize that you are the only jail keeper that ever surfaces in your own life. Whenever you realize that you have the power to be free, freedom follows. Everything you do in life is by choice, and you are free to choose again. Even prisoners are free to choose their thoughts so that they feel peace and happiness under any conditions."
The message to consider is that while life is full of cycles, staying in the moment will help to settle the mind knowing that all is well.
Peace,
Julie
A few weeks ago my mind was filled with self-doubt, with tears at the surface, feeling both physical and emotional pain. I was in this place of finally realizing what this past year has been - a year filled with constant change, uncertainty, illness, financial distress - and one that I got through quite "nicely". As I've referred to in the past, my coping style is to get through challenging times, and later, feel my emotions. In some cases, it is a year later before I even realize that I have not processed what has happened. This was surely the case here.
Each morning I awoke, remembering being in the hospital, remembering the fear I had about having a very large needle inserted into my left hamstring with no anesthesia. In fact, it was the first time I ever cried about a medical procedure, having my entire backside exposed to docs, nurses, ultrasound folks and while not feeling embarrassed, it was lying on my side with no place to escape - not knowing what the pain might feel like that scared me. The surgery which followed was easier! During this week of remembering, I needed to have blood work done which is pretty routine for me these days as I continue to build my immune system back to health, and as I left the hospital, I burst into tears, recalling how my doc told me just a year ago that he had not seen these particular cancer markers so high before.
This statement was such a disconnect for me because I was still quite functional through it all. How could this be - and yet it was. However, it no longer IS. The reality is that the past is now in the past and "each new day and moment, I am manifesting my dream of health, wholeness and abundance".
Manifestation is a process that I am working on with my coach and it has not been easy because this process requires that one take time to meditate and quiet the mind in order to focus on the moment at hand. All the shoulds, must dos and have tos do not exist - they are part of the subconscious and ego that evades being in the moment.
While the week of emotion was challenging, I believe in its benefit to really put the past to rest and as Geneen Roth stated in one of her books, "The only way around it is through it", really makes sense to me. I felt my feelings, allowed them as painful as they were, while also knowing that the reality is that I am healed, whole and perfect with my imperfections!
With the help of my coach, Matthew, I entered the following week with more peace, present-tense focus and life seemed to flow more smoothly.
This morning as I picked out my Angel Card, I pulled Freedom and the words were so very meaningful: "You may feel trapped right now by life conditions. By drawing this card, the angels ask you to realize that you are the only jail keeper that ever surfaces in your own life. Whenever you realize that you have the power to be free, freedom follows. Everything you do in life is by choice, and you are free to choose again. Even prisoners are free to choose their thoughts so that they feel peace and happiness under any conditions."
The message to consider is that while life is full of cycles, staying in the moment will help to settle the mind knowing that all is well.
Peace,
Julie
Wednesday, April 29, 2015
Plastics Toxicity and You
As I read the about the reminder of the plastic bag ban to
go into effect on May 5 in my town, it brought back memories of my post-grad
training in functional medicine and how in this paradigm, we are seeking root
causes of a lack of wellness and not endpoint disease.
Our present medical system is based on identifying endpoint
diseases rather than looking at symptoms and syndromes that lead to these
diseases. In the “functional approach”,
the quest is to halt the process altogether or at least slow it down. Our country does have excellent emergency
medicine however, and it is not appropriate to completely bash the system, but
rather to begin to look at how we can create better “health” care systems that
focus on prevention.
Back to plastics. As
was brought out in the article, we have become a disposable society and as a result, losing convenience will be a
tough habit to break. There will be
anger, frustration, a lack of ideas about what to do instead, thus the
educational component comes into play.
Board of Health member, Michelle Gottlieb put it nicely – “It’s creating
new habits”, “We have to relearn and reinvent the throwaway society that we
have created”, “It won’t happen overnight”.
This so rings true in my practice as a nutritionist and wellness
consultant. Breaking old habits and
creating new ones can be challenging, thus support and education in order to
stay focused and motivated is key. I
work very hard on establishing and maintaining relationships with my clients to
stay focused in the process.
Chemicals found in plastics have known toxins and these are BPA
and phthalates. These are known
endocrine disruptors, chemicals that show evidence for increasing the incidence of infertility, cancers, malformations
in utero, as well as influence on the thyroid, and increasing obesity. Phthalates, known as plasticizers, are found
in cosmetics, perfumes, aerosols, paints, lotions, shampoos, nail polish and I
could go on, but you get the idea! Our
bodies are bombarded in ways that we don’t even think about. Research has shown over 280 chemicals
identified in newborn cord blood and of that, 180 cause cancer in humans or
animals. Some of these statistics are
from the Environmental Working Group.
There are signs and symptoms that may present in a “burdened
body” and these include: fatigue,
depression, chemical sensitivity, autoimmune disease, headaches, hormonal
imbalances, asthma and allergies, and again, I could list more. The challenge with identifying toxic load is
that there are so many diffuse symptoms that do not fit into the current model
of diagnosis and thus, toxic burden is often overlooked.
What can we do in this challenging environment. First of all, recognize that change is not
overnight and begin by learning more about what is in your environment – from
food, to the containers it comes in.
Second, do an inventory of your “products” – and by this I mean, not
only personal hygiene, but cleaning products as well. As an aside, May is Spring cleaning month for
me and I just stocked up on my jug of white vinegar for washing walls,
appliances etc. Gone are the days of
pleasant smelling sprays and scrubs that used to be in the closet.
Check out www.EWG.org, a
wonderful resource for listing the safety of foods, personal care, cleaning
products and more.
Consider a “functional medicine” consult to review body systems,
look at tests that may identify toxic burden and if you choose to embark upon a
“detox” or “cleanse”, consult with your practitioner to make sure that your
body can handle the three important phases of detoxification.
Lastly, use this plastic bag ban as an opportunity to
re-think what is in your environment and consider taking small, deliberate
steps to cleaning up the environment for yourself and our planet.
Squeaky clean,
Julie
Friday, April 17, 2015
A Trip To The Mount
Last weekend marked the first long driving trip that I've taken since the hospital, surgery, chemo and oh, don't forget, the quarantine - needing to avoid contact with people for a while during recovery. I was excited and also anticipating how I would feel. After all, I usually get stiff, tired and creaky with long drives.
I chose to begin my day with a yoga class - always a good choice - as it limbers me up, it increases oxygen to my brain and I feel wonderful leaving class. I proceeded to meet my Dad for the visit to Graymoor, a place that I have mentioned in former blogs - one that is my spiritual retreat for the short overnight that we are there.
Graymoor is a mountain in the Peekskill mountains of NY, and was founded by a priest who converted to catholicism with the intention of uniting all faiths. The motto of the Friars of the Atonement is, "That All May Be One", and this message holds such importance for me.
My Dad and I had a nice conversation on the way there and I was able to bring Tammie with us, my little dog who is with me most of the time. It's been different since Mom died. I had been very close to my Mom, less so with my Dad - he worked a lot, was somewhat strict and was involved in his own hobbies. But things have shifted and I call it "a gift" - another one of my common phrases. I have learned more about who my Dad really is - his vulnerabilities that he used to attempt to hide under a gruff and strict facade; his true caring for others in need; his poor self-esteem-someone who really sees himself as so much less accomplished than he really is. I've also felt less afraid to show him who I am - "a gift" that having cancer brought into my life. Heck, if I can get through being a single mom, a bankrupcy, a husband passing away while another stalked me, and cancer on top of it, what is there to be afraid of - NOTHING! And yet, one of my biggest fears has always been letting others know all of me.
We arrived, got settled into our simple but comfortable rooms and I immediately took Tammie out to walk to the mountain top. It was a gray afternoon, but beautiful nonetheless. The air was clean and the valley below showing signs of Spring green on the trees.
Our visit with Fr Steve was wonderful. While Fr is 87 years old, he is so open-minded and wonderful to engage in conversation about spirituality and new ideas of philosophy - a favorite topic of mine. Early the next morning, I awoke and walked to the bottom of the mountain and back up before breakfast. It was so invigorating and this time, I felt such stamina and energy. It seems that over the last three years, I would become so winded and tired. This was even before knowing that I was sick, but this time felt like years before. I was exuberant and so very grateful.
The Mount has such deep meaning for me - can you find a place to retreat to - even if only in your backyard, woods or local lake. Take time to be in nature, to revel in the simplicity of nature's beauty and be filled with gratitude.
In Peace,
Julie
I chose to begin my day with a yoga class - always a good choice - as it limbers me up, it increases oxygen to my brain and I feel wonderful leaving class. I proceeded to meet my Dad for the visit to Graymoor, a place that I have mentioned in former blogs - one that is my spiritual retreat for the short overnight that we are there.
Graymoor is a mountain in the Peekskill mountains of NY, and was founded by a priest who converted to catholicism with the intention of uniting all faiths. The motto of the Friars of the Atonement is, "That All May Be One", and this message holds such importance for me.
My Dad and I had a nice conversation on the way there and I was able to bring Tammie with us, my little dog who is with me most of the time. It's been different since Mom died. I had been very close to my Mom, less so with my Dad - he worked a lot, was somewhat strict and was involved in his own hobbies. But things have shifted and I call it "a gift" - another one of my common phrases. I have learned more about who my Dad really is - his vulnerabilities that he used to attempt to hide under a gruff and strict facade; his true caring for others in need; his poor self-esteem-someone who really sees himself as so much less accomplished than he really is. I've also felt less afraid to show him who I am - "a gift" that having cancer brought into my life. Heck, if I can get through being a single mom, a bankrupcy, a husband passing away while another stalked me, and cancer on top of it, what is there to be afraid of - NOTHING! And yet, one of my biggest fears has always been letting others know all of me.
We arrived, got settled into our simple but comfortable rooms and I immediately took Tammie out to walk to the mountain top. It was a gray afternoon, but beautiful nonetheless. The air was clean and the valley below showing signs of Spring green on the trees.
Our visit with Fr Steve was wonderful. While Fr is 87 years old, he is so open-minded and wonderful to engage in conversation about spirituality and new ideas of philosophy - a favorite topic of mine. Early the next morning, I awoke and walked to the bottom of the mountain and back up before breakfast. It was so invigorating and this time, I felt such stamina and energy. It seems that over the last three years, I would become so winded and tired. This was even before knowing that I was sick, but this time felt like years before. I was exuberant and so very grateful.
In Peace,
Julie
Wednesday, April 8, 2015
"There Are No What ifs Only What Is"
As I sat to do my morning meditation, I found the usual "flood of thoughts" enter in. This is "my lion to tame" and I realize that we all have something that gets in the way of being balanced and in the moment!
I've avoided the whole meditation thing for years, knowing deep down inside that it would be really, really good for my "Virgo" mind. For years, I would laugh about my sun sign, stating that it is a carbon copy of me - the good, the bad and the ugly! I am loyal, empathic, a good parent, organized, a teacher AND I am critical , analytical, perfectionistic, a little OCD!. While I now embrace the various facets of my personality and behavioral type, it can be challenging at times.
Those of you who follow my blogs, know that I take my life experiences and challenges as gifts to learn by and to share with others. They can be pearls of wisdom, intuitive integration, ahha moments that change the direction of the journey - nonetheless, old habits and ways of being - the ego part of self, can find a way to creep back in.
For me, as I take on new and bigger challenges in my work and life, I find that I am persistent, a go-getter, passionate about my direction, BUT, I can be stopped by the little voice in my head that says, "what if . . ." and "are you crazy . . ." and "how dare you think you can . . .".
As humans, habits become automatic, part of the subconscious that rules about 90-95% of our thoughts and actions, and if not continually focusing on being present and aware of this very moment, it is easy to be caught up in those self-limiting statements. As difficult as it seems, especially for those of us who live in our heads, it is very possible to re-train the mind to be focused on the moment at hand, the task in front of oneself. It surely uncomplicates the situation realizing that we really only have this very moment and indeed, a precious one at that!
In peace and calm,
Julie
I've avoided the whole meditation thing for years, knowing deep down inside that it would be really, really good for my "Virgo" mind. For years, I would laugh about my sun sign, stating that it is a carbon copy of me - the good, the bad and the ugly! I am loyal, empathic, a good parent, organized, a teacher AND I am critical , analytical, perfectionistic, a little OCD!. While I now embrace the various facets of my personality and behavioral type, it can be challenging at times.
Those of you who follow my blogs, know that I take my life experiences and challenges as gifts to learn by and to share with others. They can be pearls of wisdom, intuitive integration, ahha moments that change the direction of the journey - nonetheless, old habits and ways of being - the ego part of self, can find a way to creep back in.
For me, as I take on new and bigger challenges in my work and life, I find that I am persistent, a go-getter, passionate about my direction, BUT, I can be stopped by the little voice in my head that says, "what if . . ." and "are you crazy . . ." and "how dare you think you can . . .".
As humans, habits become automatic, part of the subconscious that rules about 90-95% of our thoughts and actions, and if not continually focusing on being present and aware of this very moment, it is easy to be caught up in those self-limiting statements. As difficult as it seems, especially for those of us who live in our heads, it is very possible to re-train the mind to be focused on the moment at hand, the task in front of oneself. It surely uncomplicates the situation realizing that we really only have this very moment and indeed, a precious one at that!
In peace and calm,
Julie
Saturday, April 4, 2015
Like a Seinfeld Show - Humor in the Humanness
Reflecting on the day yesterday felt much like a cartoon show amidst the solemness of also being Good Friday. As usual, I felt great pearls of wisdom coming from the humor as well as being reverent!
Started my day fasting (which I hate to do, especially missing my morning coffee!), en route for a number of hours for the continued medical visits - first lab, then follow up appointment with my functional doc. Being organized with my food, supplements, coffee and oh yes, freezer packs to keep my kefir and bison cold, I began my day. In my left pocket, I placed my bloodstone - I collect crystals and stones and bloodstone has "Christ energy", and so I was very aware of this being Good Friday and what Jesus symbolizes in my life.
Following the labs, I went straight to the car for my latest concoction of coconut kefir, chopped pear and carrot, hemp protein, walnuts, cocoa and cinnamon powder, drizzled with sesame tahini and Permavite powder (a great insoluble fiber source lightly sweetened with stevia). Of course, I had packed my organic coffee and enjoyed my breakfast with Tammie in the car - she accompanies me on these long trips and we usually stop off for a walk.
Following breakfast, I needed to use the bathroom. Now listen carefully, as this is great news, news that is usually hush hush, but in my practice, I temper it with telling my clients that we always talk about "poops" in my office - gotta have humor!
A little background here - as I became more ill over the past few years, my IBS worsened significantly and at times, I could not wear normal clothing due to bloating. I had such fogginess, fatigue and muscle pain, that I knew I was a toxic load and "full of ----!" It has been a journey trying many medications, supplements, teas - you name it - but thanks to Matthew Liscomb, my spiritual and life coach, I have had faster success these past few weeks. Check out Matthew's link as he is an amazing healer - www.empathicguide.com
Matthew gave me info on kefir, suggesting that it could be made into coconut kefir as well, since I am dairy sensitive. I had read a lot about it, but a few years ago when I tried cultured and fermented foods, my body rejected them pretty violently. I am in a better place now, supporting growth of many "good bugs", building my immune system with my naturopath and killing those persistent cancer cells which were quite high for me and now within normal limits - woo-hoo!
As I approached the bathroom, there was one other person in there and amidst the silence, I heard her grown, flush the toilet to hide any noise and she repeated this pattern for a few minutes. For me, being in public bathrooms has been challenging - God forbid I make noise or worse yet, smell! I breathed, relaxed and reminded myself that this is a normal part of every human beings' functioning. Voila - it worked!
The take away message here is to take care of your needs as they arise, never feeling shame for paying close attention and to RELAX!
Onward to the next cartoon in my head. I tend to be technologically challenged and my kids can vouch for that! A few weeks ago, Lindsay helped me to download music onto my iphone and now I can enjoy this as I walk or am in the car. I decided to listen to my music and proceeded to pull out various cords to hook up in the car - my headset (not sure I needed that!), the charger (definitely did not need that!!) and proceeded to press play. Nothing happened. Finally, I began to laugh recognizing that I needed the aux cord. As I plugged it in, I began to laugh pretty hysterically and envisioned myself with hair on end as if electrified and wrapped up or shall we say, tangled up with wires! I immediately called Ashley, my techie and we both had a good laugh.
Moral of this vignette is to learn to laugh at yourself, find humor in things that may not be your forte. I used to go through life condemning myself, creating the story of being stupid and now know how utterly harmful this is to one's self-esteem, creating limiting beliefs.
I hope you you will Live, Laugh and Love as the saying goes!
Blessings,
Julie
Started my day fasting (which I hate to do, especially missing my morning coffee!), en route for a number of hours for the continued medical visits - first lab, then follow up appointment with my functional doc. Being organized with my food, supplements, coffee and oh yes, freezer packs to keep my kefir and bison cold, I began my day. In my left pocket, I placed my bloodstone - I collect crystals and stones and bloodstone has "Christ energy", and so I was very aware of this being Good Friday and what Jesus symbolizes in my life.
Following the labs, I went straight to the car for my latest concoction of coconut kefir, chopped pear and carrot, hemp protein, walnuts, cocoa and cinnamon powder, drizzled with sesame tahini and Permavite powder (a great insoluble fiber source lightly sweetened with stevia). Of course, I had packed my organic coffee and enjoyed my breakfast with Tammie in the car - she accompanies me on these long trips and we usually stop off for a walk.
Following breakfast, I needed to use the bathroom. Now listen carefully, as this is great news, news that is usually hush hush, but in my practice, I temper it with telling my clients that we always talk about "poops" in my office - gotta have humor!
A little background here - as I became more ill over the past few years, my IBS worsened significantly and at times, I could not wear normal clothing due to bloating. I had such fogginess, fatigue and muscle pain, that I knew I was a toxic load and "full of ----!" It has been a journey trying many medications, supplements, teas - you name it - but thanks to Matthew Liscomb, my spiritual and life coach, I have had faster success these past few weeks. Check out Matthew's link as he is an amazing healer - www.empathicguide.com
Matthew gave me info on kefir, suggesting that it could be made into coconut kefir as well, since I am dairy sensitive. I had read a lot about it, but a few years ago when I tried cultured and fermented foods, my body rejected them pretty violently. I am in a better place now, supporting growth of many "good bugs", building my immune system with my naturopath and killing those persistent cancer cells which were quite high for me and now within normal limits - woo-hoo!
As I approached the bathroom, there was one other person in there and amidst the silence, I heard her grown, flush the toilet to hide any noise and she repeated this pattern for a few minutes. For me, being in public bathrooms has been challenging - God forbid I make noise or worse yet, smell! I breathed, relaxed and reminded myself that this is a normal part of every human beings' functioning. Voila - it worked!
The take away message here is to take care of your needs as they arise, never feeling shame for paying close attention and to RELAX!
Onward to the next cartoon in my head. I tend to be technologically challenged and my kids can vouch for that! A few weeks ago, Lindsay helped me to download music onto my iphone and now I can enjoy this as I walk or am in the car. I decided to listen to my music and proceeded to pull out various cords to hook up in the car - my headset (not sure I needed that!), the charger (definitely did not need that!!) and proceeded to press play. Nothing happened. Finally, I began to laugh recognizing that I needed the aux cord. As I plugged it in, I began to laugh pretty hysterically and envisioned myself with hair on end as if electrified and wrapped up or shall we say, tangled up with wires! I immediately called Ashley, my techie and we both had a good laugh.
Moral of this vignette is to learn to laugh at yourself, find humor in things that may not be your forte. I used to go through life condemning myself, creating the story of being stupid and now know how utterly harmful this is to one's self-esteem, creating limiting beliefs.
I hope you you will Live, Laugh and Love as the saying goes!
Blessings,
Julie
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