A Trip To The Mount

Last weekend marked the first long driving trip that I've taken since the hospital, surgery, chemo and oh, don't forget, the quarantine - needing to avoid contact with people for a while during recovery.  I was excited and also anticipating how I would feel.  After all, I usually get stiff, tired and creaky with long drives.

I chose to begin my day with a yoga class - always a good choice - as it limbers me up, it increases oxygen to my brain and I feel wonderful leaving class.  I proceeded to meet my Dad for the visit to Graymoor, a place that I have mentioned in former blogs -  one that is my spiritual retreat for the short overnight that we are there.

Graymoor is a mountain in the Peekskill mountains  of NY,  and was founded by a priest who converted to catholicism with the intention of uniting all faiths.  The motto of the Friars of the Atonement is, "That All May Be One", and this message holds such importance for me.

My Dad and I had a nice conversation on the way there and I was able to bring Tammie with us, my little dog who is with me most of the time.  It's been different since Mom died.  I had been very close to my Mom, less so with my Dad - he worked a lot, was somewhat strict and was involved in his own hobbies.  But things have shifted and I call it "a gift" - another one of my common phrases.  I have learned more about who my Dad really is - his vulnerabilities that he used to attempt to hide under a gruff and strict facade; his true caring for others in need; his poor self-esteem-someone who really sees himself as so much less accomplished than he really is.  I've also felt less afraid to show him who I am - "a gift" that having cancer brought into my life.  Heck, if I can  get through being a single mom, a bankrupcy, a husband passing away while another stalked me, and cancer on top of it, what is there to be afraid of - NOTHING!  And yet, one of my biggest fears has always been letting others know all of me.

We arrived, got settled into our simple but comfortable rooms and I immediately took Tammie out to walk to the mountain top.  It was a gray afternoon, but beautiful nonetheless.  The air was clean and the valley below showing signs of Spring green on the trees.

Our visit with Fr Steve was wonderful.  While Fr is 87 years old, he is so open-minded and wonderful to engage in conversation about spirituality and new ideas of philosophy - a favorite topic of mine.  Early the next morning, I awoke and walked to the bottom of the mountain and back up before breakfast.  It was so invigorating and this time, I felt such stamina and energy.  It seems that over the last three years, I would become so winded and tired.  This was even before knowing that I was sick, but this time felt like years before.  I was exuberant and so very grateful.

The Mount has such deep meaning for me - can you find a place to retreat to - even if only in your backyard, woods or local lake.  Take time to be in nature, to revel in the simplicity of nature's beauty and be filled with gratitude.

In Peace,
Julie