Hairy Cell What?

I've referred to my cancer in some of these writings, but have not elaborated on the specifics and how health care in this country addresses cancer treatment. It had been about a years and a half of not feeling well and worsening symptoms of fatigue, achiness, migraines, often feeling flu-like. When I finally got the diagnosis of hairy cell leukemia, a rare leukemia, I actually felt some relief. There was finally a name for what I had. Now, it is important to note that I had always feared cancer and avoided learning about it, always referring patients to cancer nutrition specialists. What I learned about this cancer is that it was slow growing, but progressive, usually affected males in their mid-70's. The only treatment available was chemotherapy. These chemotherapeutic drugs can improve function for up to 10 years if the patient responds. But, what is understated is that these very drugs can cause more virulent cancers, neuropathy and other side effects. After weighing the pros and cons of traditional treatment, I chose to look into alternative therapies. It is not easy to find out about alternatives and in fact, many of these programs were forced out of the United States and into other countries. Being the networker that I am, I was connected to a wonderful naturopath in Connecticut and an organization, People Against Cancer. This organization assessed my labs and provided me with information about traditional and non-traditional treatments specific to my cancer. The challenge was and remains that since this is such a rare cancer, there is less information about treatment protocols. For example, many solid tumors - breast cancer, colon cancer - do better with vegetarian diets, whereas I need red meat, lots of protein. I was connected to a program in Germany and went for three weeks. I learned about detoxification in ways beyond what I already knew, as well as spending a lot of time meditating, visualizing myself as being already healed. We spent time out in nature and organic meals along with alkaline water. We used a papimi machine that created a thumping sound, used to alter the energetic rhythms of the various organs. While working hard in this program, I was also on a very specific supplement regimen. I take over 100 supplements daily, some with food, others on an empty stomach. I refer to this as my chemotherapy because some of the mushroom extracts help with supporting the immune system, while others assist the liver in detoxifying the body. I have not been sick since being on this regimen. In addition to looking at the physiological aspects of the disease, we learned about the spiritual and emotional aspects of certain cancers. Leukemias refer to lacking joy in life, lacking self-love and I could certainly relate to this. My life had been dedicated to serving others without really thinking about what I wanted, what was my purpose and passion in life. While I love my work, music, being with my family, I had become a workaholic due to life circumstances. It was easy to focus on work and providing for others because I needed to do this, but what was totally missing, was stopping to take time to replenish. All of a sudden, it clicked - I did not give to me the way I gave to others. I did not show myself love and now my body came to a screeching halt. I was exhausted, unable to do things in the way that I once did - "the energizer bunny" of the past. But what was even more challenging is that my disease is considered low grade and I can still function, wanting to function, yearning to keep things as they were, being successful. As I started to feel better in the Spring, I fell into old habits - more work, taking on extra responsibilities, not listening to my spirit that needed rest and continued visualization toward balance. Speed on to July - blood work worsened, stomach involvement due to compromised immunity, low energy. But at least this time, I recognize that I have a choice - either workaholism that will kill me or stepping back into a period of true healing - work, fresh air, meditation/yoga, my various treatments - vitamin C IV's, infrared sauna, energy work. My spirit feels strong - I can heal, but it will take time. I continue to work closely with my medical team and coordinate my care which is time-consuming. I meet with my oncologist every 3 months, my functional medicine doc every 2 months, my naturopath every 2-3 months, consult with my People Against Cancer director to revise my supplement regimen and consider what labs need to be done. I look at this period as a "bump in the road". Life lessons are valuable and if these challenges can be seen as gifts, one can succeed with true healing. I've always taken the road less traveled and I will continue along this path - I know that this process will be an inspiration for others in the future. This is one of the gifts of my cancer. I plan to heal my cancer, listen to its message, not blast it away. After all, it is a part of me. In health, Julie